Relatable Tweets About What It’s Like To Be Attracted To Men

Ever felt like you absolutely could not stand the guy that you had a crush on, but also you really really really really liked him? Have you ever been afraid to tell your friends that you're seeing a guy because you just know how hard they will disapprove of him?

As a girl who has dated way too many guys who were objectively horrible people (and borderline unsanitary), I often find myself questioning how I could possibly be attracted to these dopey creatures who have never used an iron. Here are some tragically relatable tweets about what it's like to be a woman who is into men.

How Are Men This Clueless?

Finding a man that has anything even resembling a skincare routine is like finding a unicorn in the wild, but I always thought they at least understood the basics of moisturizer. Apparently not.

Boyfriend asks if he should wipe moisturizer off his face with a paper towel
Photo Credit: Twitter / @helenbholmes
Photo Credit: Twitter / @helenbholmes
ADVERTISEMENT

Ah, Yes: The Good Old College Days

ADVERTISEMENT

I hate how much I relate to this. Once upon a time, I really was into the frat guy whose coffee table was always littered with empty cans and was sticky from weeks of uncleaned beer spills.

Woman says college gives you stockholm syndrome and makes you enjoy hanging out with frat guys
Photo Credit: Twitter / @holy_schnitt
Photo Credit: Twitter / @holy_schnitt
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

You Want To Do Cute Fall Things, But You Also Want To Kill Him

ADVERTISEMENT

What's the point of having a boyfriend in the fall if you're not going to go on adorable autumn dates? We're going, even if I'm mad at you and your stupid brain.

ADVERTISEMENT
Tweet: lets go to a pumpkin patch so I can throw one at ur stupid head
Photo Credit: Twitter / @aaria
Photo Credit: Twitter / @aaria
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Same, Britney. Same.

ADVERTISEMENT

I want to get "addicted to getting my feelings hurt by men" tattooed on my forehead so that I don't even need to wear the party makeup for people to know I'm a clown.

ADVERTISEMENT
Girl thanks lesbians who hit on her, but says shes unfortunately heterosexual
Photo Credit: Twitter / @Brittany_broski
Photo Credit: Twitter / @Brittany_broski
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Attractiveness > Literacy

ADVERTISEMENT

Almost all of us have seen, or have had a friend who was seeing, a guy who was unbearably stupid but he was so good looking that we pretended we didn't notice.

ADVERTISEMENT
Tweet: saying goodbye to my friends as I leave the bar to have sex with a hot guy who probably doesn't know how to read
Photo Credit: Twitter / @tinderdistrict
Photo Credit: Twitter / @tinderdistrict
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

He's Trash, I Know

ADVERTISEMENT

Yeah, we get it. He's not a good guy, but he stole all of my good sense away when he gave me a forehead kiss and now I think we have to get married.

ADVERTISEMENT
Girl talks about how her friends have trash crushes
Photo Credit: Twitter / @miragonz
Photo Credit: Twitter / @miragonz
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Take A Look At R/Relationships: It's Wild

ADVERTISEMENT

This may be a joke, but it's actually not too much of an exaggeration. Forgiveness and the ability to overlook someone's flaws is one thing, but there has to be a limit, ladies.

ADVERTISEMENT
Woman compares women and men on relationship ask forums
Photo Credit: Twitter / @nikkiblackcat
Photo Credit: Twitter / @nikkiblackcat
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

I Love Having My Feelings Get Stepped On

ADVERTISEMENT

The worst part is that, realistically, I will let the guy who hurt my feelings probably hurt them again because I believe in second chances, or third chances, or seventeenth chances.

ADVERTISEMENT
Girl sarcastically talks about how funny it is when boys hurt your feelings
Photo Credit: Twitter / @holy_schnitt
Photo Credit: Twitter / @holy_schnitt
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Chads and Brads Have A Little Something Going On, Okay?

ADVERTISEMENT

I wish this wasn't the case, but, for some inexplicable reason, I consistently find myself liking guys who own Saturdays Are For The Boys flags and use 3-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, body wash.

ADVERTISEMENT
Girl resignedly admits that she likes frat boys
Photo Credit: Twitter / @snoopdogfanpage
Photo Credit: Twitter / @snoopdogfanpage
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Everyone Raises Their Hands

ADVERTISEMENT

I don't even like my taste in men, so imagine how hard it is for me to explain to my friends why I'm attracted to the guy who doesn't know how to do laundry!

ADVERTISEMENT
Tweet:
Photo Credit: Twitter / @brookeoslin
Photo Credit: Twitter / @brookeoslin
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

We All Know A Matt

ADVERTISEMENT

There was a Matt I had a crush on in the eighth grade who I let copy my homework everyday, and since then it's just been a long stream of Matt's who have been no good.

ADVERTISEMENT
Tweet: If y'all ever catch me so much as LOOKING at a buy named Matt ever against you are legally required to punch me in the face
Photo Credit: Twitter / @tinderdistrict
Photo Credit: Twitter / @tinderdistrict
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

We All Know A Girl Who Needs This

ADVERTISEMENT

I actually can't count the times I've been confused by the fact my beautiful, interesting, kind friend is dating a guy with the personality of a potato who treats her horribly. WHY?

ADVERTISEMENT
Tweet: Idk whose girlfriend needs to hear this but stop letting the pillsbury doughboy's stunt double manipulate you
Photo Credit: Twitter / @MichaelaOkla
Photo Credit: Twitter / @MichaelaOkla
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Heterosexuality Is A Curse

ADVERTISEMENT

You know that this girl was just there, turning her head to look into a non-existent camera as if she was on an episode of The Office. Yikes, girl: we feel you.

ADVERTISEMENT
Tweet: think heterosexuality isn't a curse? my boyfriend just started playing the bongos on my butt after half a long island iced tea
Photo Credit: Twitter / @jamieloftusHELP
Photo Credit: Twitter / @jamieloftusHELP
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Looking For The Whole Package

ADVERTISEMENT

I really thought that there was going to be a message of hope for those of us looking for the perfect man, but the ending really came to slap me in the face. I should've known.

ADVERTISEMENT
Girl describes attributes a man could have then says she's actually describing a lesbian
Photo Credit: Twitter / @kcath23
Photo Credit: Twitter / @kcath23
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

A Full Time Job With Limited Benefits

ADVERTISEMENT

Have you ever dated a guy and simultaneous had to teach him how to dress, cook, develop emotional intelligence, have decent pillows, and decorate his home, only for it to go nowhere?

ADVERTISEMENT
Woman says boyfriends and internships are both unpaid labour
Photo Credit: Twitter / @olivialaskowski
Photo Credit: Twitter / @olivialaskowski
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Even Celebrities Are Plagued

ADVERTISEMENT

Ariana Grande spoke to millions of girls with "Thank U, Next", as we realized that she too had been attracted to a guy who wasn't good for her long-term, and was just 6' 2".

ADVERTISEMENT
Says Ariana Grande learned what we all have: sometimes a man is just tall
Photo Credit: Twitter / @katefeetie
Photo Credit: Twitter / @katefeetie
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Not A Woman, But Points Are Raised

ADVERTISEMENT

Ladies, think about it: if you really had a choice between dating guys, many of whom are sexist, and women, it would be an easy decision. Unfortunately, I like Brads who don't own deodorant.

ADVERTISEMENT
Tweet says that if homosexuality was a choice, all women would be gay
Photo Credit: Twitter / @solomongeorgio
Photo Credit: Twitter / @solomongeorgio
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

A Fun Guessing Game

ADVERTISEMENT

First dates with men are my designated time to sift through potential red flags. Does he believe in the wage gap? Will he murder me if we get married? Time to suss it out.

ADVERTISEMENT
Girl speculates what problems the man she's hanging out with the next day will have
Photo Credit: Twitter / @ecogggswell
Photo Credit: Twitter / @ecogggswell
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Just All Around Questionable Hygiene Habits

ADVERTISEMENT

I once dated a guy who used his roommate's "hand sanitizer" instead of washing his hands regularly for two months only to realize it was actually aloe vera gel that his roommate kept in the bathroom 🙃.

ADVERTISEMENT
Tweet: that guy you think is soooo hot is washing his balls with dawn dish soap
Photo Credit: Twitter / @biboOfficial
Photo Credit: Twitter / @biboOfficial
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

It's So Unfair Out Here

ADVERTISEMENT

I can objectively say that I've been hotter than at least 80% of the guys I've been in romantic situations with and they have the audacity to treat me like I'm the ugly one all the time.

ADVERTISEMENT
i'm just a hot girl standing in front of a poorly dressed, objectively unattractive guy, telling him it's fine if he doesn't want a relationship, but could he maybe text me more consistently? He says no
Photo Credit: Twitter / @danadonly
Photo Credit: Twitter / @danadonly
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

The Book Of Isaiah Is Untouchable For Me

ADVERTISEMENT

There are at least eight distinct books of the Bible named after men who have done me wrong and at least five others that are ruined because I dated a guy named after the main figure in it.

ADVERTISEMENT
don't date a guy with a Bible name. can't even read the new testament without getting mad
Photo Credit: Twitter / @tbcstan
Photo Credit: Twitter / @tbcstan
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Liking Men Makes Me A Soft, Weird Loser

ADVERTISEMENT

On a regular basis, I'm a cool, strong, independent person who thinks with logic above anything else. But the second I catch a smidgen of feelings for a man, I'm like this.

ADVERTISEMENT
liking men is so humilating the other day I literally typed out
Photo Credit: Twitter / @lidglue
Photo Credit: Twitter / @lidglue
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

"No, Let's Actually Go To My Place"

ADVERTISEMENT

Men will have the audacity to invite you over to their apartment and it looks like this. Only one chair, no throw blankets, and a mattress on the floor and I'll still be attracted to them. Pain.

ADVERTISEMENT
men really think it's okay to live like this (photo of living room with TV on floor, playstation hooked up, and a single folding lawn chair facing it
Photo Credit: Twitter / @BrittanyVenti
Photo Credit: Twitter / @BrittanyVenti
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

My Hormones Are On Some Dumb Energy

ADVERTISEMENT

It's truly upsetting how many extremely hot men I've met but just felt nothing for and instead been attracted to a guy who thinks playing the guitar counts as a personality.

ADVERTISEMENT
my body is so mean to me I'll see a super attractive guy and be like, hey girl you into that? and she's like nah we're gonna like that one over there. the one who looks like he died of pneumonia 27 years ago
Photo Credit: Twitter / @holy_schnitt
Photo Credit: Twitter / @holy_schnitt
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

The Bar Is On The Floor

ADVERTISEMENT

I've seen so many horrible things from men that I sometimes believe that nothing they do could surprise me or that I've already seen the lowest of the low, but they always find a way to get worse.

ADVERTISEMENT
everyday I think men can't get more bottom of the barrel but they find new ways to tunnel straight to hell
Photo Credit: Twitter / @vnsrsng
Photo Credit: Twitter / @vnsrsng
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

It's So Embarrassing

ADVERTISEMENT

One of the worst parts about being attracted to men is that, when you try to explain why you were so into him, your friends just look at you like you are insane because they all saw him for the trash he was.

ADVERTISEMENT
I let a man who slept on a mattress in his living room so he could wake up and play PS4 without leaving the bed destroy my perception of love
Photo Credit: Twitter / @imnotbecca
Photo Credit: Twitter / @imnotbecca
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Why Does My Brain Do This To Me?

ADVERTISEMENT

Every once in a while, I'll meet a man who actually seems pretty kind and normal, but my body will only be attracted to the borderline illiterate idiot who messages me at 1 a.m.

ADVERTISEMENT
Guess which one I have feelings for. It hurts so bad (photo shows message previews from two people—one says,
Photo Credit: Twitter / @cal_gif
Photo Credit: Twitter / @cal_gif
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

It's Called Having A Type And It's Tragic

ADVERTISEMENT

As much as so many of us women love to deny it, we often have a "type" of guy we're attracted to and the type of often "men who are going to disappoint us."

ADVERTISEMENT
if you put the names of all the guys I've dated on a list it would sound like the roster for a private school's lacrosse team
Photo Credit: Twitter / @kellicopter
Photo Credit: Twitter / @kellicopter
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

I Only Want A Single Witness

ADVERTISEMENT

How am I someday supposed to have a wedding and publicly, in front of my family and friends, express that I am head over heels in love with a man who didn't know how to do laundry until I met him? I can't—eloping it is.

ADVERTISEMENT
I want a private wedding simply because loving a man in public is embarrassing
Photo Credit: Twitter / @notThreat3x
Photo Credit: Twitter / @notThreat3x
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

She Raises Some Points

ADVERTISEMENT

I really have a lot of audacity saying that I won't eat certain foods because they're gross when I repeatedly used to hook up with a guy who didn't wash his sheets for over six months.

ADVERTISEMENT
y'all don't wanna take the vaccine cause you're concerned about what you're putting your body??? Have you seen??? The men??? You've allowed??? In your body??? Ma'am pls.
Photo Credit: Twitter / @BreeCarvalho1
Photo Credit: Twitter / @BreeCarvalho1
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Several Months? Sweetie, No

ADVERTISEMENT

First of all, who in this day and age still has a CD player as an actual way to listen to music? Second of all, why the Shrek 2 soundtrack? Thirdly, girl, that was the reddest flag and you stayed?

ADVERTISEMENT
I once started seeing a guy who had a CD player and the only CD he haf was the Shrek 2 soundtrack anyway we dated for several months
Photo Credit: Twitter / @JoannaSheps
Photo Credit: Twitter / @JoannaSheps
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Being Attracted To Men Is A Nightmare

ADVERTISEMENT

How is it that, even when a man is doing the work to actually improve himself, he still manages to be so disappointing to the women in his romantic life?

ADVERTISEMENT
a man on a dating app told me that he does not give head because he is working on himself and does not have the mental capacity for giving, only receiving... dudes rock
Photo Credit: Twitter / @bigtimebizzy
Photo Credit: Twitter / @bigtimebizzy
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Call Me The NASDAQ

ADVERTISEMENT

How do you get a guy to actually pay attention to you, notice the ways in which you are changing, and really invest in you? Obviously, just become the stock market.

ADVERTISEMENT
maybe if I dress up as the stock market he'll finally start investing in me
Photo Credit: Twitter / @spicycasserole
Photo Credit: Twitter / @spicycasserole
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

This Is Why Men Die Younger

ADVERTISEMENT

How does a guy reach his late 20s and still have no idea what bedsheets are supposed to look like? Has he never washed sheets before? I am so horrified.

ADVERTISEMENT
my buddy was looking to buy sheets and accidentally bought a duvet cover and two pillow shams. Not knowing what a duvet cover is, he thought he had to fit his entire mattress inside it and button it up. This is who i have to split rent with
Photo Credit: Twitter / @pissboymcgee
Photo Credit: Twitter / @pissboymcgee
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

You've Lost The Right To Pictures

ADVERTISEMENT

Here's the thing: if you are ever privileged enough to receive a nude photo from a woman—if you were graced with her image—and you respond in any way that doesn't express gratitude, you belong in jail.

ADVERTISEMENT
I haven't sent a nude in 2 years because the last time I did the guy responded
Photo Credit: Twitter / @holy_schnitt
Photo Credit: Twitter / @holy_schnitt
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Can't Argue With Science!

ADVERTISEMENT

There is something deeply unnerving about men who ask for your Snapchat or Instagram handles without first asking for your number. I just know they'll be in my DMs with a gross message one day.

ADVERTISEMENT
it's been scientifically proven that if a guy asks for your snapchat and not your number he has the emotional intelligence of a crouton
Photo Credit: Twitter / @kaiteasley
Photo Credit: Twitter / @kaiteasley
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Seriously, This Is How It Goes

ADVERTISEMENT

I wish that I could say I stalk absolute hotties on the 'gram, but in reality, I spend hours of my life looking at guys who my friends would roast in the group chat.

ADVERTISEMENT
I spend way less time insta stalking guis who are like HOT hot than the ones who I have to look at like
Photo Credit: Twitter / @mpnightmaregirl
Photo Credit: Twitter / @mpnightmaregirl
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Only The Priest And A Single Witness

ADVERTISEMENT

The whole concept of a wedding is so embarrassing to me? I cannot imagine having to profess my love for a man in front of the people I love and respect. Nope—Vegas it is.

ADVERTISEMENT
i want a private wedding simply because loving a man in public is embarrassing
Photo Credit: Twitter / @notThreat3x
Photo Credit: Twitter / @notThreat3x
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

It's The Fear Of Death For Me

ADVERTISEMENT

There's nothing like trying to set up a date with a guy who seems cool only for him to be weirdly insistent you meet at his house. I will not be the subject of a Lifetime documentary!!!

ADVERTISEMENT
there's one guy on hinge who keeps insisting I come to his for a drink and refuses to meet out. It's not my skin you will use for a leather couch
Photo Credit: Twitter / @CoCoMaiPhillips
Photo Credit: Twitter / @CoCoMaiPhillips
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

In Summary:

ADVERTISEMENT

This is an unfortunate fact for me. Maybe one day I'll have a crush on a wholesome, interesting, emotionally-stable good guy, but today is not that day. Time to do my clown makeup and listen to SZA.

ADVERTISEMENT
Woman says she's hates everyone she has a crush on
Photo Credit: Twitter / @catcohen
Photo Credit: Twitter / @catcohen
ADVERTISEMENT